Rinse Repeat and Start Again

As part of “kids say the darnest things” I fell upon this little anecdote on an 8 year who said this sagely, as she mixed brownie batter purposefully. She was hearing her mom talk about their dog and then the neighbors and all through the chatter and silence, she had looked up and said those words below.

Think about it.
“I love you” seems to be the most commonly used phrase within the family, between friends, romantic partners, and husband and wife and so on. It’s a relationship bound for the most part. We hear it at least once every day, either being told to us, or we say it to someone or we overhear.
Almost akin to breathing.
‘love you honey”
“love you babe”
“aw baby, I love you!”
“you know I love you right?”
and I could go on, but you get the point.

I love how she points out that you must never really say it as a habit, but more of a conscious declaration of what you deeply feel within you towards this person you feel it for.
Purposefully, with complete mindfulness that you declare your love and affection. Not as a statement to be acted upon, and to dwell on, as a barter as a deal or as a sword held precariously, to be wanted to reciprocate.

It’s as sacred as it is common. So, be warned to not be glib about saying it.

I love the way the frail mind is referenced here.
We forget.
We all forget.
We forget the past, the fleeting present and we forget the preciousness in a relationship. We forget our promises, we forget our kindness and we forget the pleasure of feeling.
It’s human nature.
Not me. Not you. No one’s fault. It’s the way it is.

Some people forget that they are loved.
They need reminders.
Not just in those 3 words, but in the affirmations that do not require those words to be spoken. Yet, there is magic in saying them. With conviction, with depth as you look into their eyes, and to get to a point that you feel they are inadequate.
It happens when you love a person so.
Saying “i love you” just doesn’t cut it. You feel that?

Our mind is distracted, and succumbs to many an event, the present day engulfs us, and we forget.
It’s okay to repeat those words again and again and again.
Some of us thrive on them. It’s like the air we breathe. The food we need and the drop of water that we crave. We aren’t needy, we just thrive on love. Flourish on it.
Grow in it.
Bloom in the presence and affirmations of love.

It’s okay to rinse and repeat.
It is not boring. Not if you meant it in the first place anyway.
So next time, someone throws a fit at you, or they weep in insecurity, or they act up, Just stop them, look into their eyes and tell them you love them. Only if you mean it though. Then tell them.

You never would understand the value of that pause and the reboot their delicate heart gets when you take that moment to tell them that you love them.

Consider it a jumpstart to a slowly beating heart.
It’s a rescue mission at times.
So rinse and repeat and start all over again.
Flat lines are no good for anyone.

2 Ways Of The GroundHog

Feb 2nd is Ground hog’s day.

Not exactly Christmas or woohoo, it’s snow day, but just your average groundhog who is scared or lazy enough to NOT want to get out of it’s warm burrow! It’s winter,after all! And then the one time it does decide to come out to trench it’s tiny swollen little leg and belly and peek out, what does he see but a ton of cameras and very rude nosy reporters shoving their black gigantic mikes and cameras onto his home and nose. Uncool!

Imagine the scenario? Would you like the world at your doorstep just hoping you will NOT see your shadow?

It seems like an old wives tale, a folklore or something that could feature in a sci-fi novella, but nope, this is a regular feature and we all love to crowd around the TV and news – “What’s Phil saying? Is Phil out yet? Did he see his shadow? Oh God no! Oh c’mon Phil!”

Sooooooo, now that Ive officially crossed the meandering limit for my post, what I realllly want to say and ask and suggest was this:

Why not we be Phil Pauxtawny for a day? Yeah?

Alright. I’ll explain. So, you know how Phil pops up while hibernating the winter away? But pop he does? Just to say Hi, and check out the world before returning to his own cocoon?

Isn’t that how we live our lives?

In cocoons? In our comfort space? With our own thoughts, captured and dwelling in our minds and the daily grind that we have enmeshed ourselves into? We are aren’t we? So, just like Phil, how about we take a moment to step outside of our lives. Look around, and stop thinking about us and our own intricacies, but genuinely spend a little time and thought on ones who are around us? Just one person maybe? A person who you have lost touch with, who you once shared a rapport, someone who made a difference to you, even in the smallest way possible.

Reach out

So here’s a drive that I’d like for you to be a part of:

1. Think back to someone whom you lost touch with. EVEN if they are on Facebook and not really actively participating. They can be your friend, classmate, a lost cousin, an uncle, a mentor, an ex-colleague or someone you shared a carpool, a coach or your ward. Think back. Wonder. Remember.

2. Look them up. Call them. Nope, no Facebook message, no whatsapp, no tweet, no whatever else which way that the internet has thrown at us. Pick up the phone, better yet, drop in, but if they are a distance away, call them. Surprise them with your voice. With the care and the thought that you once cherished, talk to them. Genuinely talk with them. Make that time.

3. Glow in the happiness and laughs or warmth that you shared. Bask in the glory of how you two made each other. Okay, that was a bit more cozy than I meant for you to be, but you get the drift!

4. Come back here, tell me what you did and how it went and well, wish me. Yes, it’s my birthday. It’s the best gift you can give me.

5. If you are on Facebook, click on this event, and join in. Speak there. It’s okay, be yourself, no one really cares, and if they do, well, they would love you more for it. I promise you.

So, what do you think?

Relationships, however small, and however fleeting, matter. If they didn’t, you wouldn’t have remembered them.

People matter.

Networks matter.

You matter.

Agree?

 

kindness 1 – judge G

I most certainly didn’t speed on March 5th, but a cop got me just half a mile down from home and slapped me with a 21 mile over the limit speeding ticket.

Maybe I pushed the pedal down harder on the loaner car.

Maybe my mind was occupied with an intense conversation I had with a friend on the phone.

Maybe I was hurrying back to my daughter who never falls sick to get her medicines on time

Maybe I was speeding.

But I wasn’t. I was sure. Yet, there was the yellow sheet of paper that I clutched in my hand as I hurried across from the parking garage to the court building in Fairfax. This was my 4th trip. I had a ticket way back 14 years ago. Then over the next couple of years it was for my son’s license and permit hearings. Then now.

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