I am going to start with a disclaimer: I am creative, to an extent. I don’t think am out-there-creative, fantastic or anything out of the world. But I’ll admit I am. I don’t have to consciously come up with something different and one that can appeal to senses differently. Ive been told I am creative and I accept it with as much humility and to a large extent embarrassment as well.
Before people think it must be awesome to be such, it is in many ways a burden.
For the most part you feel like a sore thumb, coz you live in a realm far far away and when jolted out speak in words that many do not understand. The usual doesn’t interest you. The need to constantly be perfect eats into your nights. There are demons that keep you awake even when your eyes are wide open.
“If I had to express in one word what makes their (creative people) personalities different from others, it’s complexity. They show tendencies of thought and action that in most people are segregated.
They contain contradictory extremes; instead of being an individual, each of them is a multitude.”
— Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
The 9 traits Mihaly described (and I have taken the following lines from Schuler’s site) of such creative folks:
1. Most creative people have a great deal of physical energy, but are often quiet and at rest. They can work long hours at great concentration. (Strangely, I actually can despite the feeling that I flit a lot)
2. Most creative people tend to be smart and naive at the same time. (hahah, yessir, absolutely!)
3. Most creative people combine both playfulness and productivity, which can sometimes mean both responsibility and irresponsibility. (Ive been rapped on my knuckles for being playful, when in reality am actually getting work done!)
4. Most creative people alternate fluently between imagination and fantasy, and a rooted sense of reality. (It’s sad when that force of reality hits, but it does and due attention is given)
5. Most creative people tend to be both introverted and extroverted. (The biggest curse of it all, why no one will ever believe that I am actually a loner at heart.)
6. Most creative people are genuinely humble and display a strong sense of pride at the same time. (Yes, Ive seen folks cringe and yet wear it with a smug grin, I do too )
7. Most creative people are both rebellious and conservative. (Yep, flout rules, but OMG, how could you not follow tradition?)
8. Most creative people are very passionate about their work, but remain extremely objective about it as well. (Think they are their most harshest critics)
9. Most creative people’s openness and sensitivity exposes them to a large amount of suffering and pain, but joy and life in the midst of that suffering. (oh yes, there is so much joy in all that pain, and also seeing small pockets of happiness in the middle of pain that isn’t really pain for the outsiders, while not really caring for contentment)
Couldn’t have come at a better moment, when Ive been drowning in self-analysis on why I am the way I am, and why I cannot let simple emotions be just that, simple. So straightforward, yet so complicated.
Now I know why. Maybe I will sleep well tonight after all.
Thanks Matt and Mihaly. :)