it’s official

I signed up for a particularly daring class starting in January. It was on a whim as it’s now been established as the way I live my life. I was signing up munchkin for swim lessons and I veered off looking for what I could get done during that time. Apparently killing myself for 20 minutes on a sharp incline ellipse wasn’t cutting it.

It’s belly dancing.

I’ll wait till you pick your jaw up from the floor.

Done?

Okay, so let me list retrospectively, the logic behind my actions. I’ve had someone tell me that this belly dancing is one of the toughest ab workout out there. What with expanding my belly three times over and all those rolls that I have accumulated from before the kids were born, I figured as much as I love them (the rolls not the kids) and cherish their presence, there’s something called belly fat that apparently makes ones heart go heavy. As it is we burden ourselves with all the ridiculous idiocies when we slip and take life too seriously, in an effort to  take some pressure off my fragile ticker, I am forced to resort to desperate unheard of measures. I love my life a little too much to just sit down on the couch one day and discover that the heart gasped it’s last under all that fat smothering it.

Pilates, Ab workout terrors and pushups and situps, and diets were honestly just very boring. If I had to do something, I just as well add an element of pizzazz in it? The research on it is quite persuasive I must admit, and hey, I love dance. Best of both I figured. Ask me after I start the classes, as I’ve been prepping myself since last week(as advised), and now admit that I can feel every one of those muscles in that area. As in feel them with pain. Every movement’s in any kind of bend is now a torture. Hopefully, this pain’s worth it all.

I declared to the husband on a rare quiet Saturday morning moment when we discovered quite by accident that we were without the sidekicks (all three of them) and were actually having a conversation wherein my voice was calm and a under-sea level decibel and the man was actually able to repeat what I had just said. Rare moment you must agree.

That’s when I let it slip.

“I’ve signed up for a class Tuesdays come January. You should be home by 7:30?”

“Yeah, what class?”

Warming my way in closer, so I can cushion the blow of my words with some physical distraction “Belly dancing”

The man is good. Well, he’s been with me too long.

He doesn’t raise an eyebrow. He doesn’t laugh. He doesn’t fall for the sashaying.

He instead says “Just don’t ‘practice’ in front of me. I have some very pleasant visuals of that dance that I’d like to retain.”

He returns to his paper.

I huff and puff and stare and whine and sulk and pout and sigh and then return to my now cold cup of tea. We then get into a full blown ‘argument’ wherein I talk and he pretends to listen on the need for a new dining table.

This doesn’t end here as most wives know by now. I’ll show him! Yessir, I will.

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32 thoughts on “it’s official

  1. Well, yeah. I’d fought against imperialism all my life and now my belly is the ever expanding Indian frontier.

    I’d threaten to take up belly dancing, but I’m half afraid that Lana will take pictures. And post them. On the web.

  2. Ha ha ha.. “Dont practice in front of me….”…what a statement :D

    Just for the record, what were you expecting him to say? (sorry… chuckling loudly as I am typing this..)

  3. Ah! Cannot comment on the last part! But I must say an interesting way to work out the abs and get the extra flab out of the way. Really appealing and as you said with an element of pizzazz in it.

  4. Good Lord! I wake up and I see this! heh.

    Yes, thank you people. As of now, am resting those muscles as much as I can. Bracing for the pain that will follow, as am promised. :-)

    Mainak: KGP ka tempo hai hai! As how the husband would say.

    Praveen: Really? No kidding! That’s awesome. It sounds fun, and am trying to get one other friend to join, we’ll see.

    La Vida: Will let you know! :)

    Vijay: “ooooo, that sounds ‘sexy’. when can I get a private viewing?” :-D

    Ms. Taggart: I know right? We are very predictable to each other and by now to most of my long-time readers :-)

  5. Metlin: As the husband would put it – a belly is a sign of prosperity. Just that I’d rather be poor in that case.
    LOL@Lana posting pictures. Hey, she notices. That’s more than I can say of my partner!

    bedazzled: I hope and I hope.

    Mahendra: My husband’s a wise and smart man. In the case of not knowing better, please follow his lead :-p

    Gradwolf: Thanks for that confidence. You know me well!

    Buddy: Yessir, hope the proof of my registration helped you chuckle away? :p

    chotusworld: I know! I couldn’t believe I’d do something like that, well, actually, I can, considering I surprise myself and get a kick out of it :-)

    PS: LOL! Shocked you didn’t I? :-p

    • Yeah, she would notice, call me a “teddy bear” and refuse to acknowledge my existence in public. ;) Kidding, kidding. She’s more charitable than that, of course. She’d get me new gym clothes and give me the hint that they’re one size bigger to accommodate for my three dimensional expansion.

  6. Awesome….I love belly dancing. It is so graceful,and difficult. This is one of those forms of art where you see narrow interpretation clouding over and enveloping the art.

    Have fun – you could take before and after pictures of the tummy, you know? Just for yourself!

  7. Saumya: I so intend to do that. Pictures and measure. I just tried doing some basic steps (youtube’s a treasure) and I didn’t last a minute :|
    You describe it well :)

    Mrunalini: No. I like dance, and I don’t consider hanging onto a pole like a lizard a dance :-)

    Sands: You should try it! I am dead serious.

    Justaroundme: :-) I know, I freeze folks who come too close too!

    Doli: Not sure how consistent I can be, but I do plan on writing how it goes. :)

    MIM: Blog and husband? The man hates the media!

    Sashi: O well, romance in the traditional way, ends with marriage. :)

  8. Way to go! I have always been completely awed by belly-dance – the real kind, not the shake-various-body-parts version bollywood purveys as bellydance!

    We need a video!

    M

  9. heh, girls, why do I get the sneaky feeling that all of you are goading me on and secretly chuckling away?! :p

    sb: What a pleasure, and welcome! If I knew belly dancing would get you to my blog, I’d have posted this long ago (irrespective of belly-ing or not!)
    Regd ‘arangetram’ – please note that the husband requested for me not to “practice” and not perform. ;-)

    A&N: Yeah? I hope so too :-)

  10. Excellent!! Add some hoop dance to it…you’ll be rocking :O)
    And the article was very funny…but I think you will have a great time bellydancing!
    /*thumbs up*/

  11. Hahaha! Great post! I’ve heard of this, or I think I have. it’s called bellyrobics and one person I know who’s done it says it really worked. So all the best, and have fun!

  12. Naren: hehe, add a suffix and anything will sell! I sure hope it would work, coz am beginning to look like moturam :(

    Maggie: thankuthankuthanku! Where have you been anyway!?

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