maturity

….sinks low at a slow pace, I am told.

Saturday afternoon with the mind in complete confused state on which of the list of events laid out in front of us as a family needed priority, the husband pops the most mundane question.

He: Any groceries you need, am stepping out.

Me: eh? *woken from my deep meditative state of mind*

He: Groceries? The stuff that we need to eat?

Me: Right.  Groceries. Do we need any? *puzzled look*

He: I donno, you tell me. I have milk and bread on my list. *looks at me, pausing*

Me: hmm.. no, no vegetables. No desi stuff. *looking towards the open pantry door*

He: No vegetables? Does that mean we have no vegetables or we don’t need vegetables?

Me: It means we don’t need to buy any vegetables. *mind still occupied with my to-do list*

He: Ah, then you say “We have vegetables.” Positive. Not double negatives.

Me: Right. *throwing him a raised eyebrow and not wanting to draw this further*

He: Okay, so nothing else? Good.

Me: Wait. Pasta. Spaghetti and elbows.

He: Okay. What else?

Me: Nothing else.

He: Sugar?

Me: eh? Sugar?

He: Yes, sugar.

Me: No, no sugar.

He: Yes, there is no sugar.

*Spar-stares for the next 10 seconds, in which mine is bewildered and his is patient*

He: Look behind you.

Me: *refusing to look behind me* Why? What’s behind me?

He: The sugar jar is empty.

Me: Oh. But there’s tons of sugar in the pantry.

He: No, we don’t.

Me: Yes we do.

He: No, we don’t. I checked. *Edge in his voice*

Me: What do you mean you checked? It’s right there. *swinging the door open and reaching in*

He: It’s there?

Me: I know it is. *now on my knees checking usual shelf and not finding it* What? Of course it isn’t where I placed it coz you’re always shuffling things around my space!

He: No I don’t shuffle, only thing I care for in there is the cereal.

Me: *still with my head inside* Yea sure, who meddles with the chips on the top, the other day the salsa just perched itself in here. It must have felt very cold in the refrigerator?

He: Oh, so we need a new bottle of salsa. *jotting it down*

Me: WHAT? Why would we?

He: I donno about you but am not dipping my chip in a bowl of warm salsa.

Me: I have a new bottle in the refrigerator. *glaring*

he: Okay. So we done. What about that sugar?

Me: I really am quite positive that the sugar pack walked itself into the refrigerator or maybe even the garage and if I search for it, I will find it.

He: I searched. We don’t have the sugar.

Me: We do! *stubbornly refusing to admit otherwise*

He: No we don’t.

Me: Yes we do, somewhere.

Daughter speaks out from her corner on the couch:

“You know Madre and Padre, I am in middle school and the 12-13 year old boys are the most difficult people to deal with. Very immature and can talk for hours without meaning a thing. This conversation, very mature I must say. Dad – buy that sugar. Mom – search for that sugar. Good luck in finding it. Dad – if mom does find it, we can perhaps save that sugar pack for the time we are snowed in and we have to make a meal out of that whole sugar pack, like pure sugar cookies?

Done! Now can I get back some silence while I deal with this really terrible juvenile Math SOL review paper that I need to complete? Thank you.”

***

I don’t think I thank the daughter enough.

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37 thoughts on “maturity

  1. ROFL!!! You remember so much of the conversation even after the meditative state of mind? Brilliant. Lol, we must get to hear more stories from the Kowthas household. What say?

  2. Awesome! It’s so much fun to read these conversations a few months/years after they happened.

    Btw, did you finally manage to resolve it? I mean, did the Mr. “buy” and did you “find” it?

  3. Nice post.

    Husband and I do this all the time. And of late have taken to making it interesting by putting some money down on the outcome. But then we do not have an impressionable audience.

  4. Damn the culprit IGO…i say, this happens every sec in my home… but a brilliant solution from ur charm…Did this conversation happen in English or Telugu?

  5. Listen, I always blame it all on the man (my dad was like that– so now I generalize!) I mean, if one sees there’s so sugar, there’s not X & Y in a house and one goes out to get groceries, one should just go out and get them. Count on a man to still ask whether he should buy things he in any case knows he needs to buy. Grmpf!

  6. rads, LOL she’s precious :) Husband knows when there is no sugar? I am impressed. Mine would prob not know if I went missing a couple of days ;)

  7. @silvara: heh, they don’t mince words do they, esp not my daughter!

    Archana: I knew it! No wonder I saw a little trail on the concrete. :p

    @sands: Heh, well, since am hardly home these days with work, the poor man’s taking over. :)

    A&N: er, maybe he thought a decorative lamp was better than a housefly :p

    rads: I hope so! Coz I get teh sneaky feeling no other husband would know abt sugar in the pantry :\

    • Huh really? what’s sneaky about that? Why should’nt husbands know about what’s in the pantry? I think ur old-fashioned, still thinking that only wives shud know n take care of the kitchen stuff n husbands shud never enter that dept…that’s all long gone, in fact I encourage my hubby to know this stuff, it gives me some more time to blog n browse :)

      • Rads, please read again. I said I get the sneaky feeling, not that husbands are sneaky when they know what’s in the pantry. :-)

        Also, some do, some don’t. Nothing wrong with either imho. Everyone does what works best to keep the wheels running smooth na? :)

  8. Dinesh: Yep, she keeps us in check.

    Buddy: Sure thing! Why lamp tho’? Oh! Bulb maadiri eh? :p

    Thought B: lol, the daughter would laugh very loudly if she hears am competition :|

    Apple: Unteykada dorakadaaniki? :p

    La vida: What? Lol’ing so much no words coming eh? :p

  9. Kama: You nailed it! Seriously, if folks know better why ask I say?! Esp considering sugar is a nonperishable as pointed out! :-)

    Dharini: Welcome, and thank you :)

    sruthi: er, what’s IGo? Soem new young-adult acronym? Should I be checking with my teen?

    convo in English. Telugu would have been a riot considering he can’t manage to say a coherent sentence and I wouldn’t be able to keep a straight face :)

    Praveen: Really? Ask mom if dad knows where sugar is? :)

    bpsk: er, you mean Tuesdy morning, but now that the day’s getting over, it did feel like Monday! I worked for a long 11 hours. :|

  10. Sangeetha: heh, really? Good! my daughter calls combinations of the rest four as cartoon characters. We could have a show of our own is her fav line! :)

    Pearls: LOL. No kidding/! Wagers eh? Maybe I should try that.. at one time strip poker would have held some charm, strictly without n audience :|

    Jaya: Sugar? Of course there’s sugar in the pantry. Now. :p

    My3: ..but seriously tho’, aren’t they just precious? These are some lovely days I must say :)

    Sangeetha: Yes, we did resolve. he bought the sugr pack which I promptly used since I couldn’t find mine anywhere on my property. :-)

    Gradwolf: grrr, sure why not?! I could write a post a day on each of their antics. :)

  11. Laksh: Yea, I noticed you only update :) Thanks tho’, was bit concerned for a few minutes.

    SK: The usual, how to clone myself running different directions at the same time :)

    sb: As long as the good genes come through :)

    Solilo: yes, he got sugar alright :)

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