Lekhni tagged me with this “list 10 secrets about yourself“. I read hers and a few others and it was pretty much writing about oneself. Secretive or not depends on how open a blog one runs. Now, considering how fondly am referred to as an ‘open book/blog’, I was stumped. What more could I dig up about me that would hold a minute’s attention and not bring a yawn on the reader?
So I debated in my head on the whole tagline of this tag. So, jobless me one day decided to backtrack one route of the tag, by hopping from one taggee to the tagged and see where it goes. Guess what I disocvered? The fact remains that the word “secret” got tagged on along the way! Guess there are more freestylers around that I gave credit for. That is so what I’d do. Just to make folks talk I suppose. See how daring one can go.
Are you gonna tell us about your past loves, the time when you actually got caught for cheating, the jilted lovers or how about when you purposely sneezed into your sworn enemy’s food. Oo, how about the time when you spread that nasty rumor on that school friend who stole your position in the basketball team, or better yet the one time when you kissed your best friend’s boyfriend and pretended to care when you are hi-fi’ing yourself secretly or the time when you actually told your parents you were studying at a friends and ran off to watch the latest matinee, or something more naughty?
See, juicy? Very.
This is the kind people want to hear. Right? I know I would. Why’d anyone care if you liked M Rafi over Mukesh or if you grind your teeth when you sleep, or if you like french fries with mustard, or you read the last page of a magazine first? (I do, btw).
Nice, but ordinary. Don’t you think?
Now that I’ve set high expectations, it’s time to bring them crashing down. *wicked evil laugh*
I’ve done a few wild stuff back in the day when the repercussions couldn’t stretch too far and the only person I was answerable to or responsible for were, well, me. I now think back of all the capabilities I secretly hold within me and I occasionally feel twinges of self-pity, but definitely more relief as one can only shudder in horror where and how’d have landed if my parents had given me that freedom. Yes, that’s the kind of faith I have over my decisions!
I really did wish for this tag to be where I could teeter on the line and say it all, but I realize my readership’s increasing and some silent readers could very well be folks who may not look too kindly on my antics. So what do I do with this tag? (I know, ain’t I the girl scout trooper here, taking everything so seriously?! It’s a bane I tell ya.) So, this is how I plan on doing it. I shall tell you something about me, and then I shall take it a step further and tell you secrets I hold within me. These are not necessarily about me, but they are secrets alright. No, am not gossiping, and in any case, if you the reader do not know the person I talk about, it isn’t gossiping. I don’t have a name for it yet, but I surely know it ain’t gossip (and I am sticking to it!).
So, here you go. Remember they are secrets, so shhh:
1. I once bullied this guy on the phone. It was a prank that 2 of my friends and I put together. The said boy was a dork. He bugged us constantly. He kept telling us how he was handsome and a local Romeo and how all girls swooned over him when he, get this, biked (as in cycled)to school. Yeah. So, after a few months of this listening, one of my friends got so riled up and said, let’s play a prank. I ofered to be the voice behind this Juliet who would call him up and tell him how cute and smart he was and then ultimately when he was smitten with Juliet, we’d spill the beans. We were in 8th grade, and it went well. Afterawhile bullying came naturally to me. I was a bully in hiding. Such glee and pleasure I got out of the daily calls. Especially more so when he’d come to us later and with a pompous air declare how he had snagged a Juliet. was so much fun till I grew a conscience. No fun after that. Juliet stopped the calls and she slept better at nights. What an idiot eh?
No one need feel bad for the guy. He I believe married a gorgeous Sindi girl and is now father of twins. I wonder of course what that girl saw in him, but the saying love is blind didn’t just come out of thin air.
2. Was riding back home mid-afternoon once (must have been in 10th grade or so) and I saw my neighbor uncle do some major hand gesturing across the road. Tilt my head and I see this maid/nanny lady in the house across also similarly gesticulating. My very fertile imagination leaped with this spark. The uncle saw me and immediately grinned sheepishly and turned away. That further added chapters to my story.
3. I once tried shoplifting when I was 8 or so. I desperately wanted a set of some fancy colored bobbypins and mom refused. So as she stood and haggled with the pavement fellow regarding something else, I picked these up and held them in my hand, within my fist. The guy looked at me and shook his head. I slowly put it back turning very red in face. Thank heavens he was discreet and didn’t tell my mom. I swear I’d be walking around with a gollywog sorta hairdo with an inherent scare towards anything named ‘pin’.
4. A childhood buddy of mine recently got in touch. Last I knew he married this another friend of ours who was sufficientlys enior to him, married with a kid. Husband had passed away in the military. Commendable, noble gesture and the thing is, I know he truly loved her. Felt very happy. Then out of the blue he starts fessing up to me. He and wife indulge in menage a trois with a rotating 3rd participant. Was a little disconcerting, but as long as they are happy, who was I to judge. He assures me it’s a common happening in India, and I shouldn’t live such a sheltered life staying so far away from deep-rooted cultural restrictions. Ohkayy!
5. Since gas prices are hitting the roofs, I have started filling regular instead of premium into the Acura. Figured I was saving money. Till again, like an idiot, I casually told the husband and got an earful on how I was messing up his car and the performance and the engine’s getting busted etc etc and then he sat me down and did the math. For $1.40 I wasn’t exactly saving the world, the car or our savings. I filled premium this morning. (This was a secret till a few days ago when I got admonished for it.)
6. There was this girl who cheated on her Math exam for her 10th grade board exams. She and the girl sitting in front of her exchanged notes, formulae and read off each other’s papers. I sat in the row next to them and was really upset about it. Especially considering math wasn’t my forte and why should anyone else get more just by copying. Sometimes I wonder why I didn’t rat on them. A few years ago, I heard she was paying taxes on her million dollar home in Palo Alto. Ah well, all those formulae must’ve worked well.
7. I was recently told that if one had a mole on one’s body that one couldn’t see directly but only through a mirror, it was meant to bring fortune. I have a few. Moles, that is. Fortune, am still waiting.
8. I once cut my own hair. I was perhaps, 10 or so, and I hated how my coconut stringy tight curls weren’t as pretty as Pamela’s or Sheetal’s. So in an attempt to look cute, I cut a few stray strands up front in the hope of them magically becoming straight bangs and I’d do a swoosh like them or the female in the LUX or some such ad. Did I say my hair’s curly? Yeah, so you know what happened. Got yelled at nicely and had to further anoint my head with more coconut oil than in the Nadar shop till those strays grew back.
Quite sure I had read the abridged version of Mill on the Floss recently.
9. I can take some pretty mean self-portraits with my itty bitty camera, that have been put to some rather good use meant only for one pair of eyes. Not elaborating further in case I incriminate myself.
10. I secretly think I look like a one-eyed witch in my profile picture.
No more secrets. Am exhausted!
So who’s gonna do a brave tag, and not chicken out by just telling us your favorite authors, foods, or movies? Wait, let me tag:
Altoid, Archana, Booboosmom, Neha, Terri, Lakshmi, SB, Shmetterling, Pavan, Adithya.