narcissists

Came upon this article in DesiConnect and though the in itself had some meanderings in staying with the topic, I thought the author did a pretty concise job of drawing a bridge between narcissm and the young generation.

1. I can live my life any way I want to.
Agree or disagree?

2. It’s important to just “be yourself.”
Agree or disagree?

3. I think I’m a special person.
Agree or disagree?

If you agreed with these statements, you just might be a narcissistic
person.

The article goes on to describe why and to what extent the feeling of ‘me’ and ‘I’ has become most important in a youth’s life.
Jean Twenge, a psychologist and researcher on the above said feelings of selfishness has written a book – Generation Me. I was quite taken aback to realize I fell under the category and a little unsettling to put it mildly that I was steeped deep into being labeled ‘narcissistic or to put it in layman’s terms – self-centered.

Digesting that, as I moved on it is interesting to note that the youth of now are a lot more competitive, aggressive and well, a bit engrossed within themselves because of the way the society has structured it around. Every step seems to be a race, a competition, driving each to judge themselves and to hope to bask in the glory of success …
School, college and careers always seemed to be a rat-race – and with every passing generation, the stress levels are reaching higher grounds. I thought I had it bad, up until I see what my little ones are facing. In a bizarre twist of irony, it somehow feels that though I might personally feel the race is tantamount to intense, the reality is that the generation going through it seem to be handling it as well as they can. Is this evolution? Is this what we are meant to do? We get better with passing milestone and as the climb gets tougher, we equip ourselves to brace it and ultimately succeed. Do we really or is it just a perception? A shadow of reality and as perceived through various sets of eyes, ages and criteria.

We have to learn that we can’t always get our way. We can’t always get what
we want when we want it. That’s just the cold, hard truth about reality.

Is this reality?

The self-centered notion that “I can live my life any way I want to” needs
to be tempered by a greater sense that “I have a duty toward others.” We no
longer need a declaration of independence; we now need a declaration of
dependence.

As I see it, we seem to live in a coherently incoherent society. The network is there yet the threads that bind us togther are intangible. …but is the world ready yet to embrace each other and to become say – selfless?

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7 thoughts on “narcissists

  1. I thought I had it bad, up until I see what my little ones are facing …

    rads, I don’t understand. I thought school life sucked in India, but it seems more relaxing and actually fun for the little ones here. All the pressure I know seems to be from parents (Kumon from age three, scheduled activities every single evening / weekend, etc.)
    I only know about life until the third grade here, but it seems like fun so far.

  2. hehe, thats the idea KC.

    Terri – thinsg do get tricky as the kids go to higher grades. In india at least while we studied, there was a set curriculum and it was rote. Here, sometimes I am quite clueless in what’s happening and how the curriculum is structured in 6th grade!
    ..BUT I agree, education is a lot more fun! I wish I learnt Physics the way my daughter is doing it, I’d have been an engineer of sorts *and that is truly a record for me!* :)

  3. Isn’t it more a Western attitude to watch out for yourself over others? And maybe youngsters are picking up more of those Western attributes instead of being paavam and pazham?

  4. If we can move from living life “any” way i want to, to just “the way” i want to and if “the way I want to” takes into account my responsibilities and duties as a human, I think it might still be a tolerably livable society.

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